Wind Speed Chart
An old wind speed chart I found in some random computer files I had from 12 years ago... I found it kinda funny. Enjoy.
Calm.
Windspeed: 0 to 1 mph
Too calm. People get edgy. Smoke from BBQ rises straight up, attracting buzzards. You can smell yourself.
Light air.
Windspeed: 2 to 3 mph
Leaves on trees don't move. Smoke from BBQ rises at a slight angle. You can still smell yourself.
Light Breeze.
Windspeed: 4 to 7 mph
Leaves on trees move. You can smell the guy next to you.
Gentle Breeze.
Windspeed: 8 to 12 mph
Everyone can smell everyone. Oriental wind chimes get on your nerves.
Moderate Breeze.
Windspeed: 13 to 18 mph
Nuns make flapping sound. Leaves fly all over your yard.
Fresh Breeze.
Windspeed: 19 to 24 mph
Leaves fly all over your neighbour's yard. He yells at you, but you claim you can't hear him over the wind chimes.
Strong Breeze.
Windspeed: 25 to 31 mph
Difficult to walk. Drunks are blown over. Smoke from BBQ blown horizontally, right in to your eyes.
Moderate gale.
Windspeed: 32 to 38 mph
Trees move moderately. Boring uncle asks, "Windy enough for you?" Cheeks flap when you yawn. Aluminum patio furniture on the move.
Fresh gale.
Windspeed: 39 to 46 mph
Nuns blown over. Falling down drunks held upright. Clothes blow off clothesline. BBQ blown over-smoke from burning deck blows horizontally. Trees move rapidly.
Strong Gale.
Windspeed: 47 to 54 mph
Trees move slowly-across your lawn. Boring uncle says, "Windy? This is nothing. When I was young..." Your favourite toque blows off.
Whole Gale.
Windspeed: 55 to 63 mph
Your favourite shirt blows off. Neighbour's gas BBQ comes through your window. Your newly sodded lawn is now someone else's newly sodded lawn.
Storm.
Windspeed: 64 to 75 mph
You regret not hiring a pro to build your chimney. Boring uncle claims, "I've seen worse!" and is carried off by wind. People in trailer parks appear on tonight's news. Your underwear blows off.
Hurricane.
Windspeed: Over 75 mph
Your underwear blows off while you're indoors. People in trailer parks fly past your house. Your nose hairs whistle, even when you're not breathing. You can't close your eyes, even if you wanted to.