Roadwolf's portal for his random thoughts and ponderings

Blog Post 145 - Life in General

Blog and Journal

I am not really too sure what to write here. The last week or so has been kind of different for me. For starters I have been partaking in a few job interviews, and going from basically sitting around all day doing nothing to having to plan meetings and such on a regular basis can seem overwhelming at first. And maybe this is just it, I am overwhelmed a little? I have had a number of various topics come to my mind. Everything from global warming to addictions to sexual fetishes. And I was planning to write about them, but I just can't keep my mind in gear long enough to stay on one train of thought. There is more on my mind then just job hunting as well. I have a meeting coming up soon to become a US Citizen, and although I know that I have nothing to worry about, it still stresses me out a lot. Not only that, but my wife and I are looking at buying a house. Now of course my eventual dream house would likely be in Canada, in the North country. A nice A Frame log cabin overlooking a quiet lake. But for now, I would like to try and get a small but decent house in the country near Buffalo. The price range we are looking in is very doable even for us, with one income right now. The downpayment would likely have to be borrowed from family, however with the first time homeowners buying incentive program that is going on right now, we would get about 8 thousand dollars back on our tax return which would more then pay off any downpayment we would have to borrow. Our downpayment would likely be about $2,800 or so for a 80k house, on an FHA mortgage. Which is not bad. Then we use seller concessions to try to pay the rest of the fees and the taxes. While owning our own home 'could' be more costly in the short term, in the long term we would be saving a lot more money, and infact it is an investment. When and if we decide to sell and move back to Canada, we will have a nice chunk of money which we can use to place a downpayment on a house in Canada with. Instead of living paycheque to paycheque on rent, why not invest into something, for about the same cost per month? Also I have noticed that I have become very quiet with a lot of my friends. I feel bad for this as I do try to be there for them and be their guardian angel as it were. But I just have so much on my mind that I do not really know what to say half the time. I know there are a few friends who made contact with me because they heard i was very caring and supportive, and I have not been living up to those standards lately. That does bother me. I suppose I just have to take some me time, and look inwards. As my friend Levi said. I spend a lot of time and energy being there for other people, and when it comes down to being there for myself, I sometimes ignore myself. I suppose that is just who I am, but I do know that it is important to pay attention to my own thoughts. I have also been working on a Team Fortress 2 server. Server IP: if you play team fortress... My clan, the Fastlane Crew has set it up, and I have been helping them tweak the settings to get it operating properly. We have so much fun playing there. Usually we have All Talk enabled so both teams can talk to each other over voice chat. And the playful taunting and name calling can get very funny sometimes. Lets just say there is a lot of sexual induendo... 'How does that shot gun feel up your ass?' - 'Mmm that feels good, but next time grease it up a little' Fun times! I honestly think that because the FLC is so clique in a way, that we do scare off some new players who come to us. But on the other hand, if people have a sense of humor and are fairly laid back, they usually will want to join us. I got my wife playing TF2 now with us on a regular basis, and she enjoys the clan. I kinda wish I could get some of my other friends to come play too however. I guess thats about it for now. I am getting my car fixed on Monday. Large repair. The shop is just down the street from me, and is run by a friend of mine who I met off of craigslist. I am glad it is a friend who is doing the repair then someone I don't really know. Until next time, have a good one! :)

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